Bullies

 This is such a great topic.  I want to share my experiences of going through divorce with others so it can help bring awareness and to help others move forward in a positive way so you don't drag it out like I did.  This journey has taught me so much and has put me in a place of control that I would have never had otherwise.  Control is key and you must set up control to have peace in your life.  You cannot move forward and accomplish anything in life if you are being held down by people who want to control you.  

I started these blogs not long ago because I finally feel like it's a good time to start helping others to take back control of their own lives.  The peace it's brought me is healing and others need to find this place of peace.  I have shared my story with a couple of friends who are now just going through their divorce and it has spurred me on to help teach people what I know. 

First:

Bullying and projection go hand in hand.  (see my other blogs) They are very closely related.  Like cousins.  If you have one, you will have the other.  

Where do I start ...let's start at the beginning.  I have been divorced now for 5 years but it has only been the last 2 years that I have started implementing my boundaries.  Do not let it drag out like I did.  It was a lesson learned for me.  

I have been down this road of being bullied by friends and family after going through a divorce.

Example:  my son came to me after my dad's funeral and let me know a certain family member had been talking badly about me to him.  And he proceeded to tell me the things that she said.  (this is passive aggressive behavior) and I did not deal with it at that time when I should have.  

Second: 

Bullying will come in many shapes and sizes so your first task is to recognize it .... 

Things to look for is a change in behavior from the person, beratement, putting you down, negativity, gossip, trying to control you with discouragement or just bashing everything you do.  They will try to get others to see you in a negative way.  Be diligent in watching for these signs.  You will need to jump into action as soon as these issues pop up.  Do not let it drag out.  It will only cause you more problems.  Learn from my mistakes.  I let issues go I should have jumped on immediately. 

Once you have discernment of who they truly are set up that boundary.  They will learn that there are consequences to their actions.  And make it known to others that you have a bully in your mix so they to can put a stop to ugly behavior.  Name them one by one.  

Go and read my other blogs and it will tell you how to handle the situation once you recognize the behavior.  

Hope this helps your journey. 

You are the controller of your life. 

Enjoy your life by your own parameters.  

Have a great day 😊